Playing Dirty In Divorce Can Boomerang

If you are going to divorce your spouse, you may have feelings of resentment, anger, and shame.  Perhaps you were married to a really awful person, and you’ve been emotionally devastated time and again.  You’ve suffered promises for a better life, and ridden the roller coaster of hope and disappointment one too many times.  Now you want out.  Beyond that, you want revenge.  But now is the time to get the cogent advice of an experienced divorce attorney, whose dispassionate view of your situation could save you all kinds of heartache down the road.

Revenge Seems Sweet 

1. Ok.  You want more than a simple divorce: you want to make a statement.  Your plan?  Clear out the house while your spouse is away at work.  A moving company could pack up your belongings—right down to the last pot—and have you out of there within hours.  As you imagine the shock and rage experienced by your spouse upon arrival, this seems like the perfect revenge.
2. Maybe something a little less drastic, but every bit as humiliating and outrageous, would be to cancel the credit cards.  Imagine your spouse stopping to fill up on gas, only to discover that none of the credit cards will go through.
3. Let your spouse’s boss know—anonymously– about some unsavory details that could get them fired.  Wouldn’t that tickle your fancy to know you were behind the termination!
4. Cancel the utilities after you move out.  Wouldn’t it be gleeful to know that nothing works in the place!  After all, your marriage didn’t work out, so why should the lights, heat, water…
5. Clean out your bank accounts.  Similar to canceling the credit cards, this is a way to both surprise and humiliate your spouse.

And it Boomerangs 

While it may be great fun to fantasize about all the ways to get even with your ex, the fact of the matter is that people who play dirty are generally met with the same.  If you think you’ll be sitting back and laughing your way to divorce court, think again.  Payback could be much more egregious than anything you’ve thought up! Once you’ve thrown down the gauntlet, you are fair game.

1. Your spouse could return the favor in kind.  Did you think there was no way to embarrass you?  How about serving a summons or subpoena at work!  That would be a big laugh!  Not.
2. Wherever you wind up living, don’t think for a second that your spouse won’t find out and find ways to make you miserable.  The opportunity will come.

You Have to Live with Yourself 

Ultimately, what you really want and need is a divorce. All the rest of it is just a way to stir up unpleasant feelings, feelings that will stick with you for a long time if you feed them.  How much better to play it clean and turn the page with dignity and self-respect.  Allow yourself grief as you surround yourself with supporting loved ones.  Then go through the process while being mindful of where you want to end up.  Yes, you may have to be tough.  Let your lawyer handle that part.  For fair and dignified divorce representation, schedule a confidential consultation with the Springfield divorce attorneys at Courtney & Mills.  You won’t be disappointed.