“Consensual” Discipline is Really Just Domestic Abuse
The Bible is “silent” on the topic of domestic abuse, or so say some, justifying their lack of condemnation for intimate partner violence. In fact, there are those who believe that any violence that occurs between a man and his wife is actually consensual, since wives agree to be subject to their husbands’ discipline when they agree to marry. Call it crazy, but that goes a little too far considering it’s the 21st century and all that we know about domestic violence.
Religious Justification of Abuse
A quarter of all adult females in this country—about 12 million women—will experience intimate partner violence during their lives. We are learning that faith communities sometimes allow men to rationalize their behavior as a God-given right to dominate their wives. Equally impactful, women are taught they must submit to their husbands. Deep- seated religious beliefs may lead women who experience abuse to stay in dangerous settings, believing that to leave would be a betrayal of their faith. After all—‘til death do us part is a real vow taken by many who may not be prepared for the realities of violence in their marriage. It is a factor that profoundly complicates the distressing problem of domestic violence.
Case in Point
In discussions of family violence, Pastor Jonathan Shelley twists himself into a pretzel as he defends accusations of domestic violence that were leveled against a fellow pastor. The complaints include:
- Beating his wife with electrical cords on multiple occasions;
- Slapping his wife in the face over and over again;
- Punching his wife with a closed fist;
- Bloodying his wife with physical assaults more than once.
As the Bible does not address domestic violence per se, Shelley is unwilling to condemn the behavior.
The Irony of Faith in This Situation
We know that domestic violence is not limited to those of a particular faith. There is a huge spectrum of beliefs that gives abusers the justification to coerce and control their spouses, using religious doctrine as a bludgeon. The irony is this: religion is often the source of strength for victims, while at the same time leading them to feel betrayed by the very faith they embrace as they suffer. This can be particularly difficult when religious leaders tell women they must continue to endure the abuse in order to reap the rewards of the afterlife.
Abuse is Never Okay
The experienced Springfield family attorneys at Courtney & Mills are no theologians, to be sure. Nonetheless, we understand the complexity that religion can add to the mix when families are plagued with domestic violence. We believe that abuse should never be tolerated, and are prepared to assist survivors with the legal questions they face when attempting to escape a violent marriage. To discuss your situation, schedule a confidential consultation in our Springfield office today.
Source:
lgbtqnation.com/2024/09/hate-preacher-defends-unhinged-colleagues-alleged-wife-beating-in-shocking-video/
